Rate my Male Space. I live in an empty blue abyss. How dateable am I. M, he/him, 313 years old, 5'8", pisces, no hobbies, premature greying, occupation: god of death, no benefits or insurance, not sure what to offer you although i do have muscles, but you can't see them under my silly bathrobe uniform and no i will not take it off to prove it

Akiva counts on her fingers. AKIVA: "You've got good looks, cool death powers and--... No.... furniture?" She folds her arms in disapproval. AKIVA: "Is this really all you've got? You just sit on the ground all the time?" AZRAEL: "Yes..." Akiva throws her arms up, comedically enraged. AKIVA: "This is miserable. How am I supposed to send Beron in here to date you if your bachelor pad is an empty abyss? You at least need like, an Ikea fold out sofa or something." Azrael balks, his pupils widening in surprise. Then he breaks into laughter. He smiles for the first time in a very long time. AZRAEL: "Beron? Why Beron?" AKIVA: "Why not Beron? A lonesome hunk, just like yourself? Listen, I'm a VERY good matchmaker. I don't wanna brag, but I just landed the world's hottest girlfriend, so I think I'm on to something."